|
| "And ask my baby to dance; and he'll say yes.
Because these words were never easier
For me to say or him to second guess
But I guess, that I can live without you but
Without you I'll be miserable at best."
How do you move on from love to just being yourself? How can you watch someone that you still love, be happy with someone else?
I can't deal knowing that they could be doing all the same things we did. I can't deal with seeing us in my head. Except it's not us, it's them. I can deal with him, getting over him is hard but not as hard as...
I can get over her, I don't even know her. I didn't even want to know her name, but some people don't get how hard it is for me to deal with...
Them.
What happened to us? Where did we go? What's wrong with me? Why can't I get over him like he got over me? Why can't my life be as happy as his looks?
Why did I do this to myself? Why did I fall so hard?
I want to deal. I want to get over him so bad. But it's so hard to go from perfect together...
To alone.
If they're happy, I wish he'd just let me know. I wish he'd just tell me to back off. I wish he'd just tell me I don't have a shot. I wish he'd just tell me to move on.
I wish he'd tell me where I stand, and if I stand a chance at all.
Just like the beginning
Except this is the end
The spill made me feel so much better. Like he finally knew everything I wanted him to know and I though after:
"The ball's in his court now."
But this is almost worse, not knowing what's going on in his head. Not knowing if it affected him at all.
I wish he'd tell me where I stand, and if I stand a chance at all.
My parents are worried about me. My teachers are worried about me. Most of my friends are worried about me. It's okay, it's nice to see that they care. Even if I hate the looks I get walking down the hall from them. I can't stand people feeling sorry for me but it hurts to pretend like I'm fine. Like I'm just peachy recently.
Everyone's telling me they miss my old happy self.
I'm sorry if I'm not that way anymore.
I'd try and explain but I don't want to explain myself to anyone anymore.
Just know that, right now, it hurts.
So many people can pinpoint what I'm going through but the fact that you went through it, doesn't make it easier for me to deal. When you talk about it, all it does is make me want to cry. Because I realize how pathetically still in love i really am and it makes me feel so helpless because I'm trying so hard, and getting nowhere.
"But you cant stop watching (him).
Wondering what hes thinking,
If he thinks you look pretty,
If he still cares... if he hates you... if whatever."
I know you all keep telling me to push him out of my life for a while. Just to show myself that I don't need him. And you all say you know it's gonna be hard but I'll be fine. I just need to get over him. I see where you're all coming from, I know that it's probably the best thing to do. But I don't want him out, he was one of my best friends before any of this 'Josh and Dani' stuff and sooner or later he's gonna be there and they're gonna be there.
And I'm going to hate it, I'm probably going to hate it more every time.
But if she makes him happy, I'll learn to live with it.
If he knows inside that she makes him happier than I would then I'll handle it.
I wish he'd tell me where I stand, and if I stand a chance at all.
I know I've spent too much of my life making other people happy and I know that every once and a while I'm allowed to say: "What about me?" and I have, I have so many times. Because all I want is my baby back, if i had it my way I'd make him love me again. But I can't do that, and I can't control what's in his head.
And I wish he'd tell me where I stand, and if I stand a chance at all. | | |
| I'm everywhere I wanna be
All tangled up in you
You're by my side, just close your eyes
You're such a dream come true
I gotta get this off my chest
And you don't have a clue
So take my hand and understand
Cuz baby I love..
(You)
There aren't enough hours in the day
That could help me explain
Why I'm running around
So high off the ground
Tryna get into your heart.
Got me up here in space
'Thout a name or a face
And I'm tryna get back
But baby you got me up here with
No Gravity; No Gravity.
(Come back to me)
There's no surprise inside your eyes
You knew this day would come.
You said it back, don't take it back
It's all been said and done
Got me hoping that you'll never leave
My heart out on the run
I'm wrapped around your finger now
And swearing you're the..
(One)
There aren't enough hours in the day
That could help me explain
Why I'm running around
So high off the ground
Tryna get into your heart.
Got me up here in space
'Thout a name or a face
And I'm tryna get back
But baby you got me up here with
No Gravity; Come back to me.
[song by: Danielle Tolman 'Heroes Held Hostage'] | | |
| With the sunshine, comes the rain
And I've watched it pour too many days
I'll smile and pretend it's all for the better
Keep myself clueless no matter the weather
You've wronged me one too many times
(Tell me, tell me how'd we end up like this?)
So here I go taking back what's mine
(Tell me, tell me how'd we end up like this?)
You left me (blind)
You left me (alone)
You left me wanting
(More)
I need it (now)
I need you (here)
I need to feel the
(Rain)
Regardless of how rough or cloudy it gets
My heart will stay in it dripping wet
And when you want it; You'll still find it
Outside your window
Screaming for rainbows
You've wronged me one too many times
(Tell me, tell me why'd we end up like this?)
So here I go taking back what's mine
(Tell me, tell me why'd we end up like this?)
You left me (blind)
You left me (alone)
You left me wanting
(More)
I need it (now)
I need you (here)
I need to feel the
(Rain)
Electrified by fallen power lines.
Black and blue so
Done with you.
Electrified by fallen power lines.
Black and blue so
(Through with you.)
You left me (blind)
You left me (alone)
You left me wanting more.
(Tell me, tell me how'd we end up like this?)
I need it (now)
I need you (here)
I need to feel the rain.
(Tell me, tell me why'd we end up like this?)
So make it (stop)
And take it (back)
I'm tired of feeling this way.
[song by: Danielle Tolman 'Heroes Held Hostage']
| | |
| After lots of feedback from some very reliable sources, I can say it. I haven't (yet) but at least i now know I can. They're just words at first, they're supposed to be given time to develop into feelings and that, hopefully, they will. I think the only reason I was so scared to say it was because they used to mean more. The way those words used to feel when they were said between Matt and me, is the way I'm used to them feeling. They were given time to simmer before they were tattooed into what we used to share. I'm used to them meaning the world, I'm used to having the world instead of the greatest thing in it. What I feel may or may not be the same type of thing I used to feel and I'm okay with that. I'm okay with taking us and letting it simmer. Right now I'm just happier than I think I've ever been. Well, maybe I've been this happy, back before serious relationships and before cheaters and dealers. Back when couples were icky. Back when I was one of the boys, not one of those girls. But that was then; this is now, and now, I'm better than okay and I plan to keep it that way. | | |
| Tobacco products kill 1,200 people a day in the US, but it rarely makes the evening news. How come?
People dying of tobacco isn't in the news, because it isn't news. As stated in the question, tobacco kills 1,200 people a day in the United States alone. It happens so often that people aren't surprised anymore. It would shock me more if someone told me that Micheal Jackson was born white. Which is a known fact, but would still surprise me more than someone saying that tobacco kills millions of people very year.
Plain and simple, it isn't news, because it isn't news. | | |
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